Sunday, June 8, 2008

Giving up !!!

Why we humans find it so hard to gave up on things?
and that sometimes didn't apply only on "things " but extend to our relations with people.
N.B.: don't wonder about the relation of Sony Erricson mobile phone picture with the following bla bla bla, just continue reading and find out !!!
since my childhood as I guess most of you had have experienced friends separation, due to many causes, the most common cause for me was moving from one place to another.
and that kind of separation affected me deeply, I still remeber my chilhood best friend her name was SEKAB she was from Alsham, her parent were mixed arab one from Palestine and the other from Lebanon, or Jordan, I don't know exactly coz u know in childhood these origins doesn't matter at all, and still doesn't matter to me in my adulthood.
we spent our 1st six years of primary school together, it was only six years and my heart still sqeezing when I remeber the day when we had to leave our place to come back to Libya home for the last time, the separation was so painful, all the excitment of coming home couldn't sooth it, never met with her again ever since.
That even though was a normal life experience, but unfortunately it affected my all friendship later on, in fact I get along with people very easily, but have friends very scarcely, not because there is not much enough good people around, there are many, but I have that ever lasting fear of separation which keep pooping up his face in front of me.
but I realized later that having few friends is more worse coz ur loyality will be bigger and the relation will be deeper and having one of those few friends lost is a catastrophy, and it happened to me again about 4 years back, a cherished friend moved away!!!
but we survive at the end, that is the life.
what brought all this up is that I am still having, from time to time, that feeling of buzzeled scared soul, while I am waiting for the never ending process of my paper work to finish.
and reach the catastrophic moment of separation, and this time not from friends only but from brothers, relatives, friends, colleagues, a life !!!
Am I exaggerating ? it might be an exaggeration , but writing that makes me better.
back to my mobile, which was the main trigger for all this post, it was a good friend for more than five years , and never let me down, even now when I finally gave up and agree to change it, the problem was not because it bothered me, but because it started to bother my phone callers (is it right to say phone caller in English ?) in the last month, who had suffered an agony while trying to recognize my voice through a weired jamming sound, although I was hearing them clearly, what a loyal phone !!!
my Mom with my dear brother who were trying to help me geting over the love and loyality to my mobile phone, were really so brilliant to bring a phone which is very similar in it's shape and colors to my previous one and of course a Sony Erricson, and present it to me as a birth day gift yesterday, yes it was my day :)
which is might ( might in english reflect just a small possibility) be and only might be the real source of all this doom.
and yes my friends I feel much better now :) writing is always work for me.
this is my new toy: