The study is keeping me away from this place, but every once in a while I keep a passion to come back here. That passion which push me to type some few words, sometimes meaningful words, sometimes not, but in one way or another it gives me a kind of fulfillment, which I can't find in any other place.
The study is going fine, six hours in the morning at the study center then back home to take some rest and open the on-line materials to continue the torturing jouney. Ok, this is not moaning, it is jsut a description of what am I going through. This was my choice and I respect my choices, but there is always part of me which is skeptic and try to play the cynical voice in my life. And from time to time this part starts to moan and complian. I managed to turn this voice off with logical and rational reasoning. And whenever I fail to do so, I give it the space to carry out it's creativity. I let it drive me in it's crazy plans. So far they aren't that crazy, actually I am enjoying them. They either indoor or outdoor activities. Although these activities eat up some of my precious time, they do give me extra boost of energy to let me continue this hard path which I drew for myself.
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In this post I would like to have a stop and say thank you for my parents, family, and friends who have been so supporative lately. Special thanx to Miss Class my best friend back home, I am so grateful for your supportive phone calls.
Also I would like to thank the small Libyan community around me here, for everyone who keeps checking on me, and special thanx to the couple who were generous enough to send me that extraordinay dish which I include it's picture in this post,. They have been blessed with a babyboy lately , inshAllah he will be from assalheen. And the biggest appreciation goes to my friend and her husband who both keep checking on me regularly on everyday bases either by a visit or a phone call. I don't need to say her name, she knows herself.
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Everyday I thank ALLAH for surrounding me with such a wonderful people. Wherever I go he grants me with these kind of soul-lifting highly spiritual kind of people. I ask Allah to give me the power and strength to continue in this battle, and keep myself up to meet their expectations.
Now I invite u all to share with me this delicious traditional Libyan dish of Couscous, feel like home :)
To have a similar experience in people as mine keep this Doaa with you
اللهم اني أسألك حبك وحب من أحبك وحب عمل يقربني الى حبك , اللهم ما أعطيتني مما أحب فاجعله قوة لي فيما تحب وماذويت عني مما أحب فاجعله فراغا لي فيما تحب.
by the way "Ayham" is the name of the babyboy :)
It seems that this space of mine has been abandoned lately. I thought today that it merits some attention. To tell that time shortage was the cause for this desertion, wouldn't be entirely accurate. Writing was always and will continue to be a sort of like breathing to me. So let's say that I'm either getting other ways to respire, or I'm not giving myself the room to breathe properly. Anyway whichever is the truth; here I'm apologizing for the faithful visitors of this page, and trying to rebuild the "rapport" I once had with this corner of mine.
The Journal club is really good place to unwind from the overwhelming study atmosphere that I started lately. It's a self-study program in which you are required to spend about 6 hours a day, for a period of 7 to 9 months; these hours are just the requirement. In fact I need much more than this to really cover the materials on time. This was not a surprise for me, I already know about this before I came here; though things feel different when you start it. People have always been the main source of motivations for my work and study; unfortunately in this program I am trapped in my desk alone, stuck just with my books and DVDs. Of course there are people studying in the same lab, but they gave you the impression of being unapproachable, they either seem to be haughty or dead. May be I look the same! but I'm not aware of it!
my favourite tree at the park
